For My Wedding
I wrote this song when I was living in New York City. I would fly to Nashville to perform. I played in-the-round one night at The Bluebird Cafe with my friend Jude Johnstone. She has written songs for Johnny Cash, Trisha Yearwood, and more.
Many Los Angeles musicians were moving there, as the song was still king there, and the L.A. music world was turning to Rap and other styles that had usurped the prominence of the singer/songwriter genre.
Jude is from Maine, like me. Her father worked with my mother. We have history together. She loved my song and sent it along to Don Henley, who she had been working with. Two weeks later, he called me. He recorded a beautiful version on his solo album “Inside Job.” Imagine what an honor that was. The Eagles don't normally go searching for songs to cover, so to be chosen to be included as a writer for a band that was an influence on me growing up, was no small thing.
Marriage is a delicate issue, if that is the correct word. 45 percent of 1st marriages end in divorce. 75 percent of 3rd marriages end in divorce. It is unlikely that there is a study on the “success rating” of marriages that do not end in divorce. It would be wrong to be cynical on this subject, or sentimental either. We all seek connection. Human bonding is the foundation of the human condition. No one wants to be alone, at least not all the time.
Just as in all matters of the heart, your ideas on love and marriage may be different from my ideas on the subject.
I suppose my song is for those contemplating a second or third marriage. I have a musician friend who has been married seven times, and has six children, at last count. Let's not be judgemental. I'm not sure how he can afford it, but I think he is a true romantic. What a high, romantic love is. Every day is spring, as the song says. My friend, with a decades-long marriage, says that you don’t even know what love is, until you've gone through the trials and tribulations of raising children, and through money and health issues.
What was your parents’ marriage like? Were you a child of divorce, step-parents, single mother?
I don't mean to write a “marriage guide for beginners” here. I still believe in love, and I wish the best for all of you.
For My Wedding
For my wedding, I will dress in black
And never again will I look back
All my dark angels we must part
For I've made a sanctuary of my heart
To want what I have
To take what I'm given with grace
For this I pray
On my wedding day
For my wedding, I don't want violins
Or sentimental songs about thick and thin
I want a moment of silence and a moment of prayer
For the love, we'll need to make it in the world out there
To want what I have
To take what I'm given with grace
For this I pray
On my wedding day
On my wedding day
I dream, and my dreams are all glory and light
That's what I've wanted for my life
And if it hasn't always been that way
Well, I can dream and I can pray
On my wedding day
So what makes us any different from all the others
Who have tried and failed before us
Maybe nothing, maybe nothing at all
But I pray we're the lucky ones; I pray we never fall
To want what we have
To take what we're given with grace
For these things, I pray
On my wedding day
On my wedding day